Two days ago I decided I was going to start writing regularly on this blog, while I slowly worked on my Everyday Homeopathy website to get it ready for launching.
I started writing but it felt constrained and like I was trying to be “nice”, so I left that first post.
Yesterday I tried again, but it too felt awkward, there were things I wanted to write, but they sounded childish, so I’ve left that one to sit in draft status too.
I started listening to “Big Magic” by Liz Gilbert. I’ve listened to it twice before, have nodded my head in agreement to many things she spoke about in the book, but never did anything further.
It’s taken multiple listenings, I’m now on my third time through, to get the feeling that it’s ok for me to write, just for me.
I’m not writing with the specific intention of being a self help guru (although if something you read of mine sparks a positive change for you that would be awesome), I’m just writing for myself.
I’ve asked myself why I don’t just write what needs to come out in a journal. I do write in a journal sometimes but it doesn’t seem to have the therapeutic effect I hear people raving about.
I feel that for my improved wellbeing, I need to write publicly. Because in writing publicly, I feel like I’m receiving the acknowledgement I need, not from anyone else, but from myself.
This is one of the quotes from “Big Magic” that I love:
You’re not required to save the world with your creativity. Your art not only doesn’t have to be original, in other words, it also doesn’t have to be important. For example, whenever anyone tells me that they want to write a book in order to help other people I always think ‘Oh, please don’t. Please don’t try to help me.’ I mean it’s very kind of you to help people, but please don’t make it your sole creative motive because we will feel the weight of your heavy intention, and it will put a strain upon our souls.
So, I’m going to write. I have so many things to write about; homeschooling/unschooling, homeopathy, vaccination, health and wellbeing, parenting ideas, business, travel and so much more that consumes my daily thoughts. I’m not an expert in any one of these subjects, but after 46 years on the planet, I do have some experiences (with plenty more to come) that I want to share.
I’ve been afraid to write, in fact I even got called a coward a few days ago. That remark wasn’t in reference to me avoiding writing (there’s a whole other story behind it), but it has added to the evidence that I need to stop avoiding writing for fear of being judged.
So this, I believe, is the central question upon which all creative living hinges: Do you have the courage to bring forth the treasures that are hidden within you?
― Elizabeth Gilbert, Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear
I may not have the courage to write every day, but right now I am committing to writing and I’m giving myself permission to leave it in draft if I’m not ready to publish and would prefer to have the writing just for me.
Oh, and one final gift to myself, no pressure to find “the perfect image” to accompany a blog post. I love the images from Unsplash and I’m going to allow myself to just grab an image that speaks to me at the time I finish writing and add it to my post. I don’t need any extra hurdles to getting my writing out into the world 🙂
